Welcome Change!

So, I started this job where I have to be at my personal best and I am loving it!  Yea, I know I am suffering from the honeymoon-phase-of-a-job fever, but, I have a feeling I will enjoy it! (fingers crossed)

When you step in the corporate world, you learn a few things, for example, when your HR manager tells you something, she is probably exaggerating it manifolds! Also, when they say they are not here to judge, oh yes! trust me they are! Anyway, this post is not about the dark secrets of job life. It is about something way bigger than petty gossip! It is exactly how much can you love your job and your work place or hate it because of the people around. My team at work has become more like family, even so, because, there are characters that generally make a family, you know the usual, the clown, the imbecile, the ignored and the ignorable, and the much-to-dismay-hard-to-ignore!

What I am trying to say here is we get characters everywhere and probably, it is not that big a deal for my co-workers  and they might just forget me the moment I move on to the next phase! The point is how deeply I have been affected by them. So, as always let me channelize my happy thoughts (or rather just thoughts) in the manner I know best…writing it out here for strangers to read. (I am still waiting for that mental institute to ring me back)

Any who, lets begin with two really adorable ladies in my team, Neelima and Anshika. Well, I have never had an elder sister and after a lot of unanswered calls and not-replied-to text messages to god, he finally sent you two! Honestly, I feel so protected when you are around, and I know it has only been a few weeks but that’s okay, remember that ‘you don’t need a lifetime to know someone‘ shit! So yea… now lets talk about the most active (annoyingly) member of the family! Danish… he is like those toffees you eat which are really tangy sour at first, then when you chew a little more, it turns out sweet! He is exactly like that! ( that’s all the space you are getting man! hehe…) well, he has become an inseparable part of life! Pallavi, love at first sight, looking at her you think to yourself,” I would’ve been like her, had the world not corrupted me! *Devil laugh* ” Apoorva, quiet kid, but intense and very serious when it comes to work (Jai Lance Armstrong!*nervous giggle* ) Now, rushing through some other members of the family, Vinayak, love the way you talk, dude! its like ‘Brahmastra‘ for pataofying chicks! Shrey, great companion and I hate you! (you know why!) Ajitabh, the next Ram Gopal Verma, I don’t understand if all the talented people are working here, who is doing their jobs! If Ajitabh was not a part of our team, our team wouldn’t have been so dramatic! But, It is, sadly!(WHAT THE F(gush of air) IS THIS!)

And, there are so many people, I love you all (except a few) but that’s it, I have to sleep, but I love you nevertheless! you know it, Lakshmi.

And now, our trainer, the first face of HCL(and, apparently a good one), Rakesh. He is by far the coolest guy I have met!(don’t prove me otherwise, now!) The ease with which he amalgamated in our world, making it so believable that he would be our knight in shining armor in HCL, impervious to criticism, rejection at times and at times outright mean(al) looks. Well, I have only one word for you… RESPECT!

So, this is my support group (LMAO).Stay tuned for future posts, where I just might be bitching about either or all of the aforementioned people! Welcome Change!

I sure was…

When I was born, I was a believer. I had faith, immense faith. I believed in nature’s goodness. The just balance of a higher power. I believed there was a quota of everything. My quota of good, my share of bad, wisdom, stupidity, love, hatred. While growing up, my parents taught me to judge myself, only myself. I remember they told me, if anyone else judges you , check yourself and subject yourself to the highest degree of assessment. If you measure up, don’t listen to them. If you don’t, ask yourself what would you wan’t to do about it.

What goes around comes back around, so don’t hurt people. You might not be able to live with the regret. I never asked them, what if they hurt me? I should’ve. I believed in patience, that what I did was my business, what others did, would be theirs and so would be the consequence. I believed in being friendly to whoever I met. Don’t judge a book by its cover. Welcome people with open arms. To that I received a cold shoulder, they thought I was either too desperate  for attention, or I was simply overwhelming.

I waited for the people who hurt me to apologize, I had decided to forgive them, the moment they did. They never apologized. I still forgave. I was told to take the higher road, for my clear conscience. I did, but now I cry at nights, because I can’t seem to understand how they sleep at night.

I gave, and gave more when I saw it was required, hoping I would be, if nothing else, acknowledged for it. I was taken for granted. People took from me and never looked back. They said things and never felt bad. I told myself, it’s okay, I know I am a good person. I didn’t judge them, I knew they were just lost and they would come around. No one did.

I have a clear conscience because I apologized every time I hurt some one. I helped people in need and didn’t mind if they didn’t say thank you. I forgave people who hurt me. I let go off them, when they asked me too, even if it ripped me apart.

I have a clear conscience, but I don’t believe anymore.

Now, people ask me, you are too young, how can you lose faith already? I don’t know what to tell them.